For the past month, I've been troubled with a question I ask myself. Do a huge disparity of age and the distance really matter in relationship? I just recently met someone who is more than 10 years younger than me. Also, there's another someone that I've constantly been in touch with for a long while now and is living in a country that is seven hours late than the Philippines. These two forced me to search for answers.

As of now, I cannot muster enough energy to ponder because I am physically tired. Moreso, I do not want to find out even an answer because it might just leave me wounded. More than anything else, I just need relaxation.

In order to divert my mind from my routinary life, I agreeably went swimming. It is known that the Ancient Greek first discovered the healing power of seawater. It was used then to treat some skin maladies and even back pain. Whenever you see me swimming, please don't disturb me because I am trying to relax. Also, it might be that day when I am possibly nursing and trying to mend a lacerated heart as I swim and soak myself in the sea. #SeawaterHeals #LifeLately

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I have been based in Mati City for more than five years now. It’s approximately a three-hour drive away from home which I consider quite far. Despite the distance and the state of being away from family, I have taken pleasure in my time here. I like that there are only a few people who know me because I choose to keep a small circle of kind, smart, generous, and genuine individuals. Compared back home where everybody knows everybody, I can splurge on doing activities and go places with anonymity in this city. I get to enjoy life without the prying eyes of neighbors and distant relatives. Another reason for my fondness of staying here is that Mati City and the whole province of Davao Oriental have always enticed me to visit one beach at a time within the area. For someone like me who is self-diagnosed with beach addiction, this side of the country is my den.

Staying here hasn’t always been filled with rainbows and butterflies. I have also experienced mishaps and misfortunes. There was a time that I lost a potential love which left me wondering all the what-ifs and what-could-have-beens if only the potential was manifested. However, Saint Cher always reminds me through her song that I am “Strong Enough”. Also, Santa Regine V. would sing, “But time has been such a friend, brought me to my senses again. And I have you to thank for setting me free.” I moved on. Aside from the ordeals of the heart, just recently, I tested positive for COVID-19. It was a tough time. I knew I would recover from this disease but the idea that I became a host and a spreader of the virus was worrisome. I was bothered if any people, particularly my loved ones, contacted the virus through me. These two untoward events in my life occurred while I am here in Mati. I don’t want these experiences to happen again but, made my stay here still memorable.

Some friends have asked me if I do want to live here to which I answer that considering Mati as my domicile is a possibility. Although there are still goals I want to accomplish which may require leaving this location, I will always keep coming back here in Mati, someday, one day.

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To the Guy I Met Three Years Ago

To the guy I met three years ago, I still write about you. I still go back to my tinder account, check my inbox, and scroll down to our first exchange of messages. Those first words, greetings, and smoothly done flirtings have not lost their charm to send butterflies in my stomach. On the night we met, your smile was the brightest I have ever seen. You have a smile that could brighten up an entire room. It was just a  one-time meetup but it was a defining moment. On the following day, I woke up in another country without you and not knowing when to meet you again. They say that you have found your soulmate when you can already divide your life into two- the life before and life after meeting that person. That person has changed you. It might be over the top to say this but I think that someone is you. 

At present, I still think about you. When I am in the midst of my daily routine, there are times that you still cross in my mind. I can still associate you with a particular thing, occasion, and time. When I do remember you, I message you. When you reply to my messages, I am happy. There are days that you send me random messages through WhatsApp and Instagram which never fail to put me in a better mood. You still have that certain effect on me. 

I hope that you and Iwill have a second meeting. I could be in a relationship with someone and you might be committed to God by then. Nevertheless, I will look forward to the day that we will share  conversation and breakfast together again.

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What's up?

Prior to this post, the most recent blog entry was dated in year 2015. Since then, many changes (good and bad) have occurred. For the past years, I visited five countries and local destinations which opened my mind to the vast beautiful cultures and places of the world. Visiting those countries and places has shed a light on me that there was more to life beyond the confinement of my office desk. In year 2016, I shifted work carrying the hope that this job could have an impact for the greater good; hence, making good use of my profession.  Also, the balance in my savings account has been fluctuating. I still admittedly struggle with being frugal. At present, I am contemplating on something about my career and life per se. Some people would make a comment that I easily get bored. As for me, I try to live my life without apologies and regrets. I take one day at a time because the rest is still unwritten.